How Much I Think Miley Cyrus Sucks
The other day, I went on YouTube and
decided to watch a live video. It
began with a lot of smoke and intense music. When the smoke faded away,
I saw it. The being with crazy hair and barely
any clothing. This was okay,
before she walked, swiveling her hips in such a way that I feared she
might
dislocate them, towards the audience.
When she reached the end of the stage she thrashed that head around
while bending over, whipping her hair back and forth like Willow Smith
into the
faces of those nearby, while her scantily clothed backup dancers
perfectly
executed provocative moves. This
being dressed and acting completely inappropriately was, as you may have
guessed, Miley Cyrus.
I continued to watch, despite the fact that the sound of her voice live almost made my ears bleed, and I thought, she is so overrated.
First of all, she is not at all talented, in my opinion. The only reason she is actually famous in the first place is because of her has-been daddy. The only reason she sounds remotely good in albums is because of my BFL auto-tuning. You’ll notice that live, she sounds kind of like a dying cow, while on the radio or in an album, she actually sounds tolerable. Most of the time, anyways.
Also, she has become such a bad example. In her eagerness to abandon her young, girly Hannah Montana image, she has become extremely frightening. One way to express this is to point out her appearance. On stage, she barely wears anything that could pass for underwear, and her wild hair is always whipping around as she thrashes her head, to and fro, back and forth, her face void of any expression other than that blank and angry mask that has become her default expression. The mothers of six-year-olds everywhere must be absolutely thrilled with her.
One more thing to show that, frankly, Miley Cyrus sucks. Hannah Montana and the old Miley Cyrus were young and pretended to be sweet. Not bad people, I suppose, just stuck on a terrible television show with a weak plot and unrealistic points. This pink and frilly girl now has piercings, tattoos in intimate places, and was caught smoking some sort of “legal” drug on her 18th birthday. Though her videos used to be horrible, they were at least kind of appropriate. If you consider getting on a bus filled with middle-aged men appropriate. But that doesn’t compare to her new videos. In them, there is always barely any light, and she always seems to be in a terrible atmosphere. She rarely wears any clothing, and they always have very mature content. Wretched. I’m not even going to bring up some of the lyrics to her new songs.
So, all in all, I think that, frankly, Miley Rae Cyrus, born as Destiny Hope Cyrus, sucks. She has become dark, dresses in mere scraps of cloth, and who knows what else. I’m not saying she’s worse than any other teenager on the planet, but not every other teenager does the stuff they do for the whole world to see, including the millions of young children that made her their idol.
I continued to watch, despite the fact that the sound of her voice live almost made my ears bleed, and I thought, she is so overrated.
First of all, she is not at all talented, in my opinion. The only reason she is actually famous in the first place is because of her has-been daddy. The only reason she sounds remotely good in albums is because of my BFL auto-tuning. You’ll notice that live, she sounds kind of like a dying cow, while on the radio or in an album, she actually sounds tolerable. Most of the time, anyways.
Also, she has become such a bad example. In her eagerness to abandon her young, girly Hannah Montana image, she has become extremely frightening. One way to express this is to point out her appearance. On stage, she barely wears anything that could pass for underwear, and her wild hair is always whipping around as she thrashes her head, to and fro, back and forth, her face void of any expression other than that blank and angry mask that has become her default expression. The mothers of six-year-olds everywhere must be absolutely thrilled with her.
One more thing to show that, frankly, Miley Cyrus sucks. Hannah Montana and the old Miley Cyrus were young and pretended to be sweet. Not bad people, I suppose, just stuck on a terrible television show with a weak plot and unrealistic points. This pink and frilly girl now has piercings, tattoos in intimate places, and was caught smoking some sort of “legal” drug on her 18th birthday. Though her videos used to be horrible, they were at least kind of appropriate. If you consider getting on a bus filled with middle-aged men appropriate. But that doesn’t compare to her new videos. In them, there is always barely any light, and she always seems to be in a terrible atmosphere. She rarely wears any clothing, and they always have very mature content. Wretched. I’m not even going to bring up some of the lyrics to her new songs.
So, all in all, I think that, frankly, Miley Rae Cyrus, born as Destiny Hope Cyrus, sucks. She has become dark, dresses in mere scraps of cloth, and who knows what else. I’m not saying she’s worse than any other teenager on the planet, but not every other teenager does the stuff they do for the whole world to see, including the millions of young children that made her their idol.
